Responding to a sexual assault victim can seem intimidating to even the most seasoned professional.  This tips sheet is designed to prompt you but is no substitute for honest compassion and resourcefulness. We advise the strategy of Believe and Refer. It is not our job to unravel the facts.

• Believe the victim. You may be the only person the individual has told. Assure her that you understand that it wasn’t her fault and that if she’s wants you will attempt to help.
  
  
• Check safety.  Were you hurt physically and need medical attention? Are you fearful that he may return? Do you have someone who can stay at your place?

• Ask what you can do to help.  How can I help? What do you want me to do? Some individuals may want nothing more than you to listen.

• Make her aware of options. Safe Harbor, East Alabama Medical Center Sexual Assault Nurse Examiner Program, Rape Counselors, Family Physician, Police, Counseling. Check understanding—it would not be uncommon to be very overwhelmed even if they look and act very calm. Individuals deal with trauma in unique ways.

• Support without being directive. Acknowledge your desire to help but recognize her need to make the decisions. Let her know that you will support her choices and will help was much as you are willing.  Try to avoid sweeping statements about ‘everything being ok’. Recovering from a traumatic event takes time and varies by individual.

• Consult the experts. If you are unsure about how to proceed, don’t hesitate to ask professionals with more experience. You can do this without divulging the name of the individual or major details of the case. This will also help you to provide the most accurate information.

• Be patient.  Talking about an assault is very difficult for many people. Try not to appear pushed for time—even if you are.

• Be grateful.  When a student comes to you with this type of information, recognize that they see you as a person worthy of trust and willing to help.

I.    RESPECT the victim.

• Responsibility- Remember that sexual assault is never the fault of the victim.
• Empathy- Listen and believe what the victim says to you.  Psychological effects of not being believed can be as damaging as the assault itself.
• Support- Victims often feel alone.  Reinforce that you are with her. Try not to act pushed for time even if you are—you maybe the only person who ever gets told.
• Power- Victims often feel powerless.  Don’t make decisions for her.  Help her to learn her options and honor choices even if you don’t agree.
• Encourage safety- Help the victim actively pursue safety without destroying evidence.                                    
• Comfort- Lend a “shoulder” and an “ear.”  Often, at first, this is enough.
• Tools- Offer the victim options of medical care, counseling and legal aid.
  
• Be sensitive to the needs of the victim.
• Ask the survivor what you can do to help?
• Be non-judgmental.  Check your personal opinions at the door.
• Don’t assume you “understand how she is feeling”.
• Respect disclosure.  Let her decide whom else to tell.
• Present all the options to the victim.  Offer to go with her to the police, hospital or rape crisis center if you are comfortable doing so.
• Check understanding of options—often survivors are very overwhelmed.
• Remember to let her make the final decision even if you don’t necessarily agree.
• Try to avoid sweeping statement’s that indicate that “everything will be ok.” Healing from assault is a process and recovery time varies for every individual.

Contact a rape crisis center.  Even if the survivor doesn’t want to talk with a counselor, the counselor can help you help her and educate you on the local law enforcement and medical systems.

*Know that sexual assaults happen to men and boys, too.  All of these suggestions can be applied to males.